i was never taught a good attitude towards handling it. my father was a child of the depression, and he tended to walk around with large rolls of cash in his pocket that he wouldn't spend. he stressed saving for a rainy day, yet it always seemed our family was just scraping by. when he died, his minimal life insurance policy barely covered his leftover debt. i think my reaction to that upbringing was to swing the other way. i can't keep money. i spend it like an addict smoking crack. always have. i don't even have a life insurance policy, so if i died in a horrific trackday incident, Laura would have to sell my son into white slavery to pay my fucking legacy off.
i remember i had a piggy bank when i was 6 or seven, and i had amassed what seemed like a small fortune from birthday contributions - maybe $30. i have a vague recollection of surreptitiously spending every cent of it on toys & candy. a little later in life, for 7th grade Spanish class we were selling those overpriced fundraiser candy bars to subsidize an actual trip to Spain. between extending credit to bigger kids on the bus so they'd like me better (they reneged) and extending credit to myself so i could mow down on some chocolate, i went $48.00 in the hole & my dad had to pry that roll of cash out of his ass to cover it for me. i remember getting grounded for a month, doubling up on chores, and never making it to Spain.
so here i am entering my fifth decade on the planet, and i still have no idea how to properly steward my own finances. intellectually i know the things to do - make a budget & stick to it, spend no more than i earn, pay off credit cards every month rather than carry a balance, all that wise financial advice that i've heard every time i've gone for debt counseling. when it comes crunch time, i inevitably do the wrong fucking thing. i'll buy some music on iTunes & a new set of tires for my moto instead of paying extra on one (or three) of my credit cards. i always go for the shiny new stuff rather than paying for the dusty old new stuff i bought the last time.
so i've had it. it's time for a radical shift. we're going to retire the debt. i've enlisted the cooperation of my wife, which is crucial, because in many ways she is the same. she grew up accustomed to a certain standard of living, which we cannot maintain at our current combined income. i think it pisses her off at a very deep level, but it is what it is & we will never be capable of living at any higher standard until we take care of our current situation. it's not like she's bringing in a huge paycheck. for the first half of our time together, she made considerably more than i & paid the lion's share of the bills, but that situation has changed. pretty sure that pisses her off, too. at this point, it's also become obvious we can't count on hitting the Powerball - since we don't even play it.
so we're going to start with a liquidation sale. i'm going to sell my big-ass truck and my track bike - arguably our two biggest liabilities at the moment. the truck is on what used to be a low promo-APR card. not so much since the recent "credit reform;" you can bet i'll be blogging about that later. the track bike because it is my biggest luxury expense on an annual basis between a half-dozen $200 trackdays, $350 sets of race tires & all the travel to the various venues. i guess i'll get back into mountain biking in a big way. we're also selling her dirt bike & her street bike, for a time. i guess i'll find a little POS truck that i can haul my dirt bike in & that gets decent mileage.
then, for the next two or three years - whatever it takes - we are going to put every spare dollar every week into retiring the debt. first the high-interest cards, then the high-balance cards, then the equity line. maybe we can even manage to put some into the IRA. i'm just sick and tired of being sick and tired over it.
i will not touch a wheel to the track until it's done. that is my commitment, and my motivation. besides, i really, really want a Yamaha Crossplane R1 for the track. by the time we have this debt taken care of, i should be able to find one, track-prepped, for a reasonable price. and i will pay cash.
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As my hubby's grandfather used to say "its not your income its your lifestyle". I used the old "is it a need or a want". I need food, I want a new camera lense. Camera equipment must wait. I am a firm believer that the "products" of ww2 and the depression are great educators in our time of need. This is the worst economy that we have seen since the depression. If they lived well during this time they were smart people. Dont be mad at your dad. Learn from his example... cut out debit or credit cards, use cash. You will automaticlly spend 10% less.
ReplyDeleteTake those cards and freeze them in a block of ice. They are there for emergencies but a lot harder to use.(This is a serious suggestion).
Its a difficult time right now but you can do it!! Wishing you much financial success in 2010.
Alicia